I can’t remember that last time I was truly excited by a girl (no homo). I’ve hooked up with plenty of girls, however it seems so mechanical at this point. Perhaps I just don’t have enough time right now to be aroused? The past handful of girls I’ve been with have been acceptable to exceptional aesthetically, but that’s not good enough for me.
The thrill of of the chase is non existent. I hate to say it but I believe I’ve figured girls out to an extent. If all one wants to get is some physical outlet the methods are well documented in my mind. I often contemplate if I suffer from sexual addiction.
Sexual addiction is a condition where one let’s sexual relations interfere with ones normal everyday life and rational decisions. I wouldn’t consider my self greatly effected but looking back, I hardly had any feeling for girls I’ve seen. The dualism of sex and love has always been present to me but now it’s almost philosophical. I’ve been trapped in the metaphysical sex world.
Fortunately I’m recovering from my “sexual addiction” condition. I’ve implemented an indefinite “no sex” period I’m two weeks into. I feel proud!
I had a girlfriend for almost 6 months this past year. The longest relationship I’ve been in. In fact my first true girlfriend. It really opened my eyes to the difference between lust and genuine feelings for a person. I haven’t seen her since we broke up in April and she is leaving for France this August for a year. I’ll probably never see her again unless I get past my mental grudge and contact her……..will it happen? This has been itching me for weeks.